Depersonalization 

There are some moments which only steal my breath away. 

These are moments in which I am suspended in between what is reality and fantasy. 

I become frozen in time; only to feel the other world seeping through the crevice of my mind.  

All the while, another me is dying to escape her dark cell to which she has been imprisoned. 

To release her is to expel the pain and anger that accompanies this soul throughout her days. 


// Autumn Rose Marie Maurer // October 2017
 

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stuck.

Most parts of me want you gone.  The roots that you have made can be so incredibly resilient.  The pain of the illusion you created brings such bittersweet memories.  It is simply a part of my path to carry these things with me; long after you have gone.

You are not the only one who has had everything stripped from them and left to pick up the broken pieces.  You seem to believe you are the only one who could not possibly belong.  Your self-righteous victim mentality keeps me spinning.

If there is one thing that I have learned, it is that if you want to change, you will.  Running into walls is inevitable.  Staying stuck is a choice.

Survival

Survival is many things.  It’s the pounding in your heart telling you it’s all about to fall apart – again.  Everything you worked so hard to piece back together came crashing back down.  Chaos became your comfort.  How are you to blame when it’s all you knew?  You silence your truth for the comfort of others yet are chastised for doing exactly what they want.  We live what we learn, after all.  They showed you how to survive and when you didn’t do it well enough, you mastered the art better than them.  Is it any wonder, they can’t understand the place you come from?  They broke you, they made you, and you finally broke free.  You found your voice and you shattered the facade.  Your survival belongs to you, and only you.   It’s the agony only you know as your life song.

Inspired by my dear friend and fellow Advocate, Grace Durbin.

 

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the Innocent

Innocence lost, childhood taken, turned astray by those who shouldn’t betray.  Tears have been shed, lies are told, the truth could not be heard from those who chose to be bold.

They took a chance, poured out their hearts; but the evil had done it’s part.  Truth didn’t matter; what did a child know?

Children know more than we think they know, so please, open your soul.  Love every child as they need.  A child needs love to survive; for without it, they will surely die.

written by Autumn Rose Regan July 10, 2011

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